There's an emotional roller coaster coming with moving abroad and actually living in another country. Making that decision is always nerve-wracking. You probably feel excited and nervous at the same time - particularly if you've never done such a huge step before. And it can drive you crazy. So a thing to definitely keep in mind when you are considering moving abroad is, that it won't all be sunshine. But another thing to keep in mind is that it is definitely worth it because you will for sure learn something.
Phase I: Excitement
or: I’m going on an adventure!
The first phase of the wild ride is all about excitement. You just decided to move abroad and might even start in a new job. You mainly focus on all the amazing things you will experience abroad and tick off all the things you still want to do before you leave. You might write bucket lists, plan goodbye parties and post an “Off to my next adventure” post on Instagram. Getting on the plane you feel independent and strong and can’t wait to start your new amazing life. After you have arrived, you might start to explore your new home and cannot believe that the Instagram feed with all these pictures is actually yours. This is also often called the honeymoon phase.
Phase II: Culture Shock
or: Oh my God, what did I do?
I came to realize that the second stage can hit people at different times. Some have it after a couple of days or weeks at their new destination, once the excitement wears off. I usually get hit during the first night in my new home already. I am jet-lagged and tired from the flight, overwhelmed by the first impressions and I don’t even want to think of all the things that need to be organized still. You might also realize that your friends and family are hundreds of miles away and you don’t know a soul in your new hometown yet. It might be more difficult to get a SIM card than you thought it was, toilets work entirely differently and why is it so damn hard to find proper bread in the supermarket (me, literally every time I leave Germany). Maybe it was the wrong decision to come here.
Phase III: Acclimation
or: Guess this isn’t so bad.
After a while, you start to acclimate. You figured out some of the things that initially drove you crazy and are familiar with finding your way around. There are many things to explore, after all, so you start going to different restaurants, visit the local sights, and have an ‘extended holiday feeling, where you get to explore all the cool things without being on a tight schedule.
Phase IV: Homesickness
or: Oh my God, what did I do? 2.0
Even though you started feeling better after the culture shock, there will probably come a time where you become really homesick. Yes, you get along well in your new home country, you still have fun exploring, and you made some new friends along the way. But you also realize that life at home doesn’t stop just because you moved abroad. You missed your mum’s birthday and can’t stand the thought of your family being together for brunch without you. Your friends went on a weekend trip together posting a lot of pictures online and you missed out on the party. Yes, you live our new life abroad and have made great memories, but dang you miss your family and friends.
Phase V: The Long Haul
or: I’ve made it.
Finally, after several months of riding the rollercoaster, you can finally and confidently say ‘I live here.’ without getting overly excited or bursting into tears. You don’t just know your way around, you have also settled into a routine. You have your favorite restaurants/bars/pubs and incredible friends and you have accepted missing out on things back home while still staying in touch with your loved ones. And yes, there might be things you find frustrating about your new home, but you have made your peace with them. You have adapted to the new country and how things are done here. And even if you decide to move on to your next adventure, or back home, you feel like you truly arrived and will leave this place with fond memories.
Did you ever move abroad and experience something similar? I find that you can even go through these stages when moving back home (reverse culture shock).
Kate recommends: For this post, I recommend a copy of #GIRLBOSS by Sophia Amoruso - and ant not just when you’re female. Sophia Amoruso went from high-school dropout to the founder of her retail company Nasty Gal. And nasty it was, at times, for Sophia, on the way to success. In #GIRLBOSS you get a behind-the-scenes look and realize that things aren’t always as glamorous as they sound, not even moving abroad.