While every Tom, Dick, and Patrick will tell you about what to do when traveling to Ireland and how they are actually 5% Irish themselves, not many people talk about what mistakes to avoid. If you are planning a trip to Ireland in the near future or maybe even think about moving there, you are on the right page. Here is my list of mistakes to avoid when traveling to Ireland - or how to avoid looking like a fecking eejit.
#1 MOANING ABOUT THE WEATHER
Ireland is called the Emerald Isle because of its various shades of green - made possible by the lovely weather variations. Weather variations meaning you can quite possibly have all four seasons just within one day. Just last week, I woke up to sunshine, followed by rain, followed by hailstones, followed by clouds for the rest of the day. If you want sunshine all day, I highly recommend travelling to California. The Irish have developed a wonderful indifference towards the weather (‘Ah sure look…’), that I can highly recommend (granted though, I am still working on it).
#2 BEING OFFENDED BY SWEARING
The Irish are really nice - they apologize if they bump into you in a pub, they thank the bus driver when getting off at the station and they even thank the inspectors controlling them on the train. But they also swear. A lot. It’s what makes them beautifully special. So don’t be confused when the person next to you on the train is going on about his ‘fecking eejit neighbor’.
#4 NOT TRYING GUNNESS
Guinness really does taste better in Ireland. So don’t miss out on trying a pint when going to Ireland, even if you are not a beer drinker. It might have unexpected health benefits as well! You don’t believe me? Check out my Guide to Guinness post!
#3 CONFUSE CHIPS AND CRISPS AND BREAD AND TOAST
Even after almost three years this still confuses me. Chips to me, are potato chips - an acceptable party snack, but to the Irish it’s French Fries. What I call chips, they call crisps. As a German, I also naturally have certain expectations about bread. Bread, to me, is usually a dark rye sort of bread, while toast is really only the square white bread you put onto a toaster. Toast in Ireland can also be toasted bread, so it happens frequently to me that whatever is served with my food did not meet my initial expectations. You live and you learn.
#5 LEAVING A TIP
At a restaurant, if you have received good service, then 10% is of course always appreciated. With a bigger party, the service charge might already be included in the bill. When you order a drink in a pub in Ireland, giving a tip is not common practice. However, if the same person has been pouring drinks all night, a friendly “and one for yourself” (meaning take the price of a pint and put it into your tip jar - or have a pint yourself) will not be refused.
#6 IMITATING AN IRISH ACCENT
Unless you have it down, you will be thrown out of the pub. And trust me, you probably don't have it down. The Irish have a bit of a reputation to be sensitive when it comes to imitating their accent. But if you think about it, I don't really think other nations find it all so charming if you attempt to imitate their accent, say a French or a German accent.
#7 JUST STAYINGIN DUBLIN
Dublin is great and all (what can I say, I live here), bit there is so much to see in the rest of the country as well (and it's probably more authentic, too). Don't just stay in Dublin, don't even just book your hotel in Dublin and think you can get away with short day trips. Rent a car and plan a road trip really taking your time to explore. I would recommend staying ~3 days in Dublin before heading off to other places, such as Galway, the Ring of Kerry, Donegal or Sligo.
#8 NOT BUYING ROUNDS
Rounds. They are a thing in Ireland. When you go to a pub in a group, you seldom just order a pint for yourself - you buy a round for the entire group. Not paying for a round in the pub when you are out with a group is just downright rude - since once you start the rounds in order for it to be fair everyone has to pay for a round. Going into a pub as a group of 6? Prepare yourself for 6 rounds. Good luck.
#9 FORGETTING ROAD MANNERS
You are most likely used to driving on the "right" side of the road (since, you know, there are much more of us). However, in Ireland, people drive on the left side of the road. This scares many people away from renting a car, and I admit that it is something you have to get used to. However, renting a car will give you so much freedom during your trip. Yes, Irish country roads are something else, but you don't have to necessarily navigate New York City either. Most rental cars have stickers in the car reminding you to drive on the left, so just take it nice and slow and you'll be grand.
#10 THE BIG NO-NO: CONFUSING IRELAND WITH ENGLAND
Don't call an Irish man or woman British or English, this will cause great insult. Why? Because Ireland isn't England. They do speak the same language though and are culturally close. Yes, because the English pretty much forbid anything related to Irish culture, including the Irish Language. Between 1845 and 1851 two million people died or were forced to leave Ireland during The Great Famine, when trade agreements were controlled by London. The population of Ireland has never since reached its pre-famine level of ~ 8 million people. Just don't go down that road.
Have you been to Ireland?
Kate recommends: Northern Spy by Flynn Berry is a novel about two sisters becoming entangled with the IRA. I won't give away any spoilers but will leave you with the statement that it is a riveting story about family, motherhood, terror and betrayal and just downright one of the most sophisticated suspense novels. Reese knows what's good.